Thursday, April 28, 2011

Head and Heart

Journal for Christa—
In circles of ministry, we often hear about the discrepancy between the head and the heart. How often have we heard (or confessed ourselves) of the fallacy of only possessing “head-knowledge” and lacking “heart-knowledge” as if the head is to be suspect, not to be trusted.
So today, I’d like to turn that thought on end. Are there appropriate times of trusting my head and perhaps even being leery of my heart? After all, let’s face it—it’s not always just the head that doesn’t satisfy.
Our hearts deceive us when we feel like God’s merely a distant light, flickering oh so far away. Our hearts betray us when hope is overshadowed and then engulfed with deepest despair. Our hearts well up in anger at hypocrisy and common suffering and conclude that God is lacking, or not even there. The voice of the heart can be a Truth twisting demon that we listen to.
What do we do when we’ve put God to the test, and we find Him coming up short? What do we do when we find that if He was ever there, He’s there no longer? How often in the dark, under a breathless weight, I just want an epiphany to wash the doubt and bring relief. But, to be honest, I rarely find a panacea.
I guess, for me, that’s when I trust my head. That’s when to gaze into Scripture and act on the God I know, not the one I can’t feel. That’s when I take a step into the darkness, trusting all that head-knowledge: every Bible verse I’ve ever learned—every sermon or lecture I’ve ever heard—every living principle expounded on in the Word. Those are the times to turn my back to the heart and lean into what I know—the Truth in my head: that God must be there, and that He knows me—even me.

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